More tax money spent on corpse-munching festivities

In the end of June, corpse-munching Obama held an Aloha-style death offering on the South Lawn. Hawaiian hit-man Alan Wong served up Kalua pigs (Kalua: to cook in an underground oven/typically whole pigs), salmons, shrimps, clams, tilapias, chickens, lambs, baby pig rib parts, blood, pus, moldy innards and various other nasty secretions.

Wong wanted to dig a pit to roast the murdered pigs in an authentic re-creation of his cannibal ancestors' habits, however, the White House insisted they slow-burn the unfortunate cut-up souls above ground in plain view of humanity.