Thursday, July 23, 2009

Obama's Happy Meat ... You will taste the difference!

Obama’s Happy Meat offers the best tasting cuts from the happiest of hogs.

We take pride in keeping our hogs in the happiest state of wellbeing imaginable.

Besides massages and bubble baths, each and every hog gets jerked off daily and some even have individual fetishes that we cater to; for instance, Wilber, our 3 year old prize hog just about ready for slaughter prefers to cum in his servant’s face, so each day Barack jerks-off the demanding hog and takes it in the eyes and mouth. Barack and Wilber have developed a special relationship and Barack looks forward to his daily salty snacks.

To arrange for a tour, please phone ahead for best times to visit. Free samples will convince you, Obama’s Happy Meat offers the happiest, best tasting cuts of pork.

We also offer summer youth camps where children---ages 4 through 16---actually get to help take care of the hogs. This is an invaluable opportunity and space is limited.

We do offer shipping. Mail orders to:
Obama’s Happy Meat
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20500

Telephone: 1 (666) EAT-PIGS


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6 comments:

  1. I just want to see what it looks like if I use my url instead of google.

    but i tried to call the 666 number. trent answered.

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  2. THIS IS EXCELLENT!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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  3. Your articles on this page started out to be interesting and informative. I over-looked the name-calling at first and then I read this article and feel that you should have your mouth washed out with soap! If it's kindness, compassion, and peace you want, you'd better first find it within yourself before you can expect if from anyone else. If you have the gift of journalism and language, then show it instead of using such vulgar words and examples to get your point across. Although I agree with the heart of the principles you are extolling, I do not like the way you present your arguments. It smacks of "radical" instead of "realist".

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  4. Bwahaha, Busybee1952 is offended.

    Murderous corpse-munching robbers-of-life do not deserve kindness, compassion, and peace when they can't stop fucking with my friends who have no voice.

    Nice guys finish last as the millions of murdered animals testify daily.

    I too am offended, not so much by descriptive language as I am about how farmers---with the assistance of 4-H children/victims----jerk off studs for their genetic games and then when Wilber is no more use to them, they murder him and eat his butchered cadaver and claim it as the happiest meat of all.

    Obama is making sure the madness continues as do passive/afraid-of-confrontation vegans.

    No revolution was ever comfortable.

    I am only talking about what they are doing. No matter how much I sugar-coat their horror, the animals are still suffering. The gloves are off.

    "The thing worse than rebellion is the thing that causes rebellion" Frederick Douglass

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  5. it's extremely important in this day and age to be an educated consumer, so... please....

    i think we need to know more about their individual fetishes!

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